No. 1675:
It is the man who is responsible for the choices that a family and the spouse make based on God's word?!
It is I as a man who should be the leader and responsible in a Christian family where God's word is decisive.
Picture of me and my now deceased wife Berit.
The Lord gives regulations about vows and determines when vows made by an unmarried daughter or by a wife shall stand, and when not, 2-17.
Numbers 30. 1 And Moses spoke these words to the children of Israel, according to all that the Lord had commanded him.
2 And Moses spoke to the heads of the tribes of the children of Israel, saying: Thus has the Lord commanded:
3 When a man vows a vow to the Lord, or swears an oath to bind himself by a bond to do any thing, he shall not break his word; he shall do all that he has said. Deuteronomy 23:21 Ecclesiastes 5:3-4
4 And if a young woman vow a vow unto the LORD, or bind herself by a bond, being yet in her father's house,
5 And her father heareth of her vow, or of her bond wherewith she hath bound herself, and holdeth his peace at her, then all her vows, and every bond wherewith she hath bound herself, shall stand.
6 But if her father disallow it the same day that he heareth it, then none of her vows, or of her bond wherewith she hath bound herself, shall stand: and the LORD shall forgive her, because her father disallowed it.
7 If she becomes a man’s wife and a vow is upon her, or a rash word has come out of her lips by which she has bound herself,
8 and her husband hears of it, but holds his peace at her on the day he hears of it, then her vows and the obligations of her abstinence by which she has bound herself shall stand.
9 But if her husband disapproves of them on the day he hears of them, then he makes her vow which is upon her null and void, and also the rash word which has come out of her lips by which she has bound herself, and the Lord shall forgive her.
10 The vow of a widow or a divorced woman shall stand against her, whatever she has bound herself by.
11 But if she vowed or bound herself with an oath in her husband’s house,
12 and her husband heard of it, and held his peace at her, and did not disallow her, then all her vows and every bond by which she bound herself shall stand.
13 But if her husband make them null and void on the day he hears of it, then none of her vows or her bond by which she bound herself shall stand; her husband has made them null and void, and the Lord shall forgive her.
14 Every vow or bond by which she bound herself with an oath, her husband may confirm or make it void.
15 If her husband holds his peace from day to day, then he has confirmed all her vows or all her bond by which she bound herself; he has confirmed them, because he kept silent on the day he heard about it.
16 But if he first nullifies them for a while after he has heard about them, then he will bear the responsibility for her iniquity.
17 These are the regulations that the Lord gave Moses about the right of a man over his wife, and a father over his daughter as long as she is young and still in her father's house.
Being a man - especially in a family and marriage makes you "head" and leader!
1 Cor. 11. 3 I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ and that the head of the woman is the man. And the head of Christ is God.
Here in the book of Numbers it is from the Law of Moses that it is spoken about, which shows us what God thinks about the responsibility that one has as a man in relation to the woman.
Not least within the family, where among other things.
A woman can say something, but when a man or Father hears about this.
Then he can, if he does it on the same day, reverse what she – the woman – has promised.
We read:
“Every vow and every obligation to abstain and fast that she has imposed on herself with an oath, her husband can either confirm or make void.”
This again shows that the man is above the woman in making decisions and resolutions.
If one is equal in Christ, then there is still a difference between man and woman.
The man has the greatest responsibility and the best prerequisite for being able to stand up for the truth.
From the nature side, as God has shaped and formed us, man and women are not equal.
Where we are to complement each other, and the man has a leadership responsibility that in many ways is reserved for the man.
This does not mean that the woman can and should also take part in the decisions.
But the man has both the right and should have the last and decisive word and the decisions.
It is this principle of subordination, where in many ways one must say that the word of God in both the OT and NT is a form of particle governance.
Of course, that does not sound good for the way we live our lives today, even as believers.
But the word of God gives clear instructions and guides us.
God who created us, he also knows what is best for us, right?
We read, among other things, here in the word of God.
1 Tim. 2. 8 I would that men would pray, to
9 Likewise, women should adorn themselves in modest clothing, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes.
10 For as is proper for a woman who professes godliness, so should she adorn herself with good works.
11 A woman should learn in silence with all subjection.
12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first; then Eve was formed.
14 Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and was in the transgression.
15 But she will be saved through childbearing if she continues in faith, love, purity, and sobriety.
It is not the case that in a marriage and in general in the church that the responsibility is equally distributed.
It is the man who has the main responsibility, and the Bible follows a partial model in both the Old and New Testaments.
Society and unfortunately also within the churches and the church, what God's word speaks of has probably not been practiced or cultivated.
When decisions and choices are made, it is ultimately the man who has the last word that should be said. And the actions that are taken.
If he does not do that, and lets the children and the woman make decisions and let them have their own will.
Then it is the man's "fault" from God's side that he does not participate in making the decisions.
It rests on him, and God's word says this clearly.
Both in the OT and NT.
I have experience after 38 years of marriage with Berit, who unfortunately died last year.
Where decisions were made, and several times I was not enough for what was made of decisions.
That was how I see it from God's word, not the children's or Berit's "mistakes".
But mine, who failed my God-given calling and leadership role.
And if we made good decisions, then it is certainly permissible to give ourselves a pat on the back.
So as I see it from God's word, that the husband is allowed to review.
We read in Numbers 30. 13 But if her husband has made them null and void on the day he heard it, then nothing that has come out of her lips, whether it is a vow that she has made or an obligation to abstain; her husband has made them null and void, and the Lord will forgive her.
Even though this is in the Old Testament, I want to say that it should also be the basis for us who live today and in the new covenant.
God has given us his word, as rules for living.
Or should we say, driving rules for life!
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